The Last Page Comments - Laura & ChanFly

The story is funny with a great twist at the end.  The price for the book is completely ridiculous but you basically forget that part of the story with all of the issues about the last page and the fact that the tips in the book seem to be working for the boy.  You tell the story with a good interplay of shots.  This is really well done.  Since it looks like he is getting the girl then maybe the book was worth the price he paid?

The Inside Man Comments - Ding & Ester

I was a bit confused on first viewing but a second viewing and I understood more of the action with the brothel and the other elements.  The flashback portion is really nice.  You provide a good variety of shots and the story is visually interesting.  The story problem I have is that this secret, "inside man," is not being very careful about who might be learning that he is actually a police man.  You need the searching to tell the joke but there must be a more subtle way to do it to keep the core premise of the story alive.  The core premise appears to be that this is an undercover cop working in a criminal organization.

Red And Blue Comments - Bryan & Chak

It's nice to see the crazy brothers do something nicely dramatic, but you did keep the brother connection in your work.  The story is very nice and you use a good variety of shots to tell it.  I think the fact that Blue gives Red the toy while he is in the hospital is a bit confusing.  The rest of the piece is very realistic and I guess that sets off my "is it possible for a boy sick in the hospital to go shopping for a toy for his brother" alarm.  I completely understand the reason for it being in the story but it feels awkward.  It would work better if Blue gives Red a robot because of Red's effort in making himself a robot and because it seemed like a very selfish moment when he asked his mother for a robot.  Then the giving of the robot, rather than a car, becomes an important part of the storytelling because it directly connects the actions and reactions of the two boys.

DGC Information Day Comments - Michelle & Calvin

It is a well drawn storyboard and you get in a nice variety of shots.  The story is obviously creepy and I guess it is inspired by the new gray and black building.  It would have been good to hold back the horror a bit longer than you did.  I wish I had a better evil power than drinking "blood coke."  It would be nice if there was some kind of twist at the end to tie the pieces together or make you think they just "imagined" the  whole horrific situation.

Snow White Comments - Cuttle & Vicky

The story gets a little aggressive but it is an interesting turn on the traditional story.  I guess the underwater castle has breathable air inside (I am always worried about the scientific reality of a story environment)  If you are going to have horns sprout from  her head then you should do it on both sides.  That way audience members will know exactly what is going on and the way she is changing from the Snow White most people know.  The story works visually but I got a bit lost in the "this is my new invention" portion of the storyboard.  Another thing is the use of X in the eyes of the fish.  This may be something that is used in anime but from my experience X in the eyes of an animal means that the animal is dead.  If the fish is dead then I find this part a bit confusing.

Killer Comments - Christy & Kitty

I have to admit being a bit confused the first time I looked through the storyboard.  But on a second viewing I picked up the details I missed and then connected with the game as training for killing people on earth theme.  Please confirm with me that this is the theme.  It is nice that you have the parallel place but that games are used for very different reasons.  The storyboard shows a good variety of shots and gives enough of the story that it could be developed even further.

The Ice Cream Comments - Candy & Helena

Overall this is a very nice story about a day in the play park.  Within the sequences you do a good job of mixing your angles and fields of view.  The transitions between scenes and locations are not as strong and you need to apply some of the same shot change techniques when moving from one part of the story to the next.  Change angle of view but more importantly change field of view.  When you transitioned from the flat to the park you could have done of happy kids and activities in the park sort of montage.  This would have taken the audience from one location to the next.  This would also work well with the three shots of amazement that you have with the little boy as he enters the park.  The montage would have given visual reference points for the three "waa" expressions.  It would be nice if there was a larger theme the played out in relation to the ice cream but this is a good slice of life story as it currently exists.

The Hamster Comments - Janet & Cindy

This is a really good story and storyboard.  It had action and adventure and there was enough mystery to keep people interested in watching.  You had some very nice traditional themes with the addition of the Hamster on the food chain below the lowly mouse.  You provide a good sense of what the story will look like.  Really good work.

The Journey Comments - Ka Hei & Kevin

You have created a very interesting story.  The photograph is an interesting device to use to get the boy to follow the man to the front of the train.  The end of the story did leave with a few questions: did the boy jump off of the train before it crashed and that is why his grandma then walks up to him?  or does he just survive the crash?  You probably need some more duration between the crash and the boy meeting his grandmother.  There should definitely be some more shots there.  It might be interesting if the people on the train or people at the crash site think the boy is the bad guy.  What did happen to the bad guy?  Did he jump or die?

Destiny Comments - Celesty & Sharon

Beautifully made storyboard.  The music is also working well though it is not required.  I really like the wide shot of the world with the ocean currents and the different paths of the ducks.  Did the Japanese people throw the duck back in the water?  You didn't show viewers that moment and it made me confused for a bit.  Really well told story and you show enough shots so that the viewer has an idea of how the story will be produced.  You do great twists and turns and it certainly doesn't turn out as one might expect.  This would also be a great animation and one of you should think about doing it for an Honours Project or both of you should think about doing it in the future.

The Wolves Comments - Sandy & Mon

Nice job with the music and the SFX and the timing of the storyboard panels.  Clouds moving in over the beautiful sunset would have been a more natural transition and do an effective job communicating the coming danger of the night.  The grows nicely with the conversation in the tent.  It would be good to stay inside the tent for the initial wolf howling.  That would keep the viewers in contact with girls and the drama that is building.  A really great story with a great ending.  This would make a great honors project or something in the future.  It could be a really good adult animation.  You have a great twist and then she faces her guilt and chooses the cowards way out.

Hidden Treasure Comments - Zoe & Tim

The Story jumped from suicide to the Piggy Bank.  You need a transition here even if it is just a CU of the Piggy Bank or the Bank Book.  From the XWS of BU you need an MS or CU of the school logo on the side of the building before you go to the map.  The viewer may not be as familiar with BU as you are.  Need to see the bug spray coming out of the bag.  Nice transition using the mosquito to get your main character to the pool.  I don't understand "the water in the pool brusts."  If the water went out then why does he still have his scuba gear on?  Need to have a visual way to get from the discovery of the treasure spot to the use of the "gimlet."  There are some funny ways that you can do this that will fit well with the mood and humour of this piece.  It is good for the storyboard to show the variety of shots you will include while he is jackhammering the bottom of the pool.  What I don't know is what happened to the guard.  AAAAAAhhhhhhhh, it just ends...what happens, does he get the money?  does he get the op?  does he find happiness?  Don't leave us hanging, tell us what happens.